A Whole New Feeling...

Been going out with this guy and he seems to be fabulous... He has never made any attempt to "sweet talk" me and what fascinates me is, we bicker all the time (but in a friendly manner) and I'm actually enjoying it... Hmmm... We've gone out for 3 times and when we are together, there weren't a single moment of silence. I actually feel comfortable around him. Well, there are good vibes but let's just see how things go... Coz' seriously, I have no idea how he feels towards me... Best that we remain friends as now and let nature take its own course... :)

Weekend Blues

One would often heard about “Monday Blues” but lately, for me, it’s the weekend blues that is getting to me. Things are getting beyond control. I just CANNOT be at home because the moment I’m alone, I will start to think of that bastard. My mood swing is getting from bad to worse… Sigh, I’m totally thankful knowing the fact that it’s Monday tomorrow. At least I can get out of the house and work my mind off…

Well, I was out the whole day yesterday, been shopping! And today, I went to KL just to ‘trim’ my hair. How mad is that? This weekend, I’m totally occupied… but what about the weekends to come? What am I supposed to do?

Sigh, I am now wondering when I can be completely healed… My brain and my heart are totally not in sync, feel like crying again… It seems like I’m going to have a mental breakdown soon… What the hell is wrong with me?

Recaps

It’s been ages since I updated my blog and so much had happened ever since my last entry in 2008. I got promoted last year and my post was confirmed a month ago. I’ve finally got a new boss. I was in a relationship and a month and a half later, I’m back to being single. I guess life ain’t always a smooth sailing journey but why does mine sucks big time? Sigh… why can't I meet good-qualities men???

To start off, I’m so lost as in I really do NOT know what to do now. I ‘was’ (noticed the past tense?) in a relationship with this guy. His name is KT. We started off being friends last year, added each other through Facebook and realized that we were somewhat related to work. Basically, he works with our supplier. In February, we started to talk on the phone and things were going 'perfect'. We talked on the phone every night, SMSed each other and we clicked quite well. Two weeks later, he managed to convince me to become his girlfriend and he practically announced to the world that he had found the one. He talked about marriage; he talked about buying a house, building a family, joining accounts and etc. I believed him… completely.

For some strange reasons, starting from 3 weeks ago, he started to become cold. There are fewer calls, lesser time on the phone, lesser SMS and the time that I spent on MSN with him was like less than a minute a week. He seemed to be distancing himself. Well, he hasn’t been calling since two weeks ago (to be exact, 15 fuckin' days). What boggles me is that if he wants to break up, at least have the courtesy to let me know. He practically went MIA! Worst part, he even deleted his Facebook account. Sigh, I don’t deserve to be treated like shit, but somehow or rather, that was the exact feeling that I had back then. As a matter of fact, nobody deserves to be treated this way. The result of his disappearance has caused a major change in my life. I wasn’t able to sleep well. I wasn’t able to eat well. I cried. I sobbed. I teared. Losing weight has never been this easier.

Well, bygones are certainly bygones. I have officially considered myself as being single again. I guess, sometimes, it’s not necessary to call it off via face-to-face. Action does speak louder than words and he had proven his point by doing exactly that! What a bloody coward!

To KT (I know he’ll never be able to read this), I’m very thankful as you have given me an opportunity to find out that you are truly a NATO (No Action, Talk Only) guy in a short period of time. Thanks for not prolonging my pain. Thanks for acting like an arse and thanks for disappearing from my life. Thanks for telling plenty of LIES; you are indeed a top salesman. Thanks to you, I now have phobia with guys who try to 'sweet talk' into my life. Hmm, I wish you all the best in your future undertakings. Farewell… for good.

I Just Hate Bitches!

I shall repeat it again... I hate bitches and I am gonna make this known to the whole wide world. I've been having problems with a colleague who kept on giving me trouble instead of me giving her one. Guess what? She even bitched about me in front of the person who has got the biggest authority in the company... the GM! Now, it definitely doesn't take a genius to know that she did that to me. Right after her "supplier" lunch meeting with 'da GM, the GM said he wants to talk to me. We spoke and he asked me some really strange questions (tho not direct questions but it does imply something). Well, like what I have mentioned in Facebook, I've never been more happier and it's good to find out her true colours now rather than later. One thing's for sure, I'm gonna cut-off clean with her. The friendship ends and it's gonna be pure colleague relationship. I will not be bothered to even attend to her wedding. She can forget about that.

If there's one thing I learn, don't be nice to people. They will take that person for granted and will even go to the extent of suspecting that person of backstabbing him/her in front of da boss! And that's because da' boss is giving him/her the cold shoulder and that person happens to be close to the boss. This will definitely trigger him/her (who is definitely at fault) to suspect you and thus, bad-mouthed you in front of your other colleagues. Worth it? Nah, I don't think so. -Once bitten, twice shy- To the bitch, you can go fly kite. -End-

Blessed

My grandfather held a birthday celebration at a restaurant at Damansara Kim last night. He's 81 years old, not in the best of health but I can see that he was really happy last night. Now, my grandfather and I wasn't very close (long story, eons ago...) but when I saw him last night, he was close to tears and he wanted a hug from me. I hugged him and he kissed me on the cheek. At that point of time, I was quite touched and honestly, I was about to tear as well. For 28 years, my grandfather had never even bother to hold my hands nor even give me a call to ask about my well being. As such, I have never had a strong bond with him. But seeing him last night, just changed my whole perception towards him. Perhaps, he is getting old and he knows that he doesn't have much time left, so, he wants to make things right. Mom is right, no matter what happens, nothing can change the fact that grandfather is still her father, and he is still my grandfather. When we bid farewell last night, I gave my grandfather a hug and told him that I will pay him a visit whenever I am free. That's a promise... :)

My First Entry

After much hesitation, I have finally decided to create a blog. Why blog? Well, it's just to keep track of what I have been doing and at the same time, pen down my thoughts (or should I say, type out... :p). Well, neway, things haven't been going smoothly lately. Overloading of work, misunderstanding between colleagues, ain't enough time to settle my stuff, constant migraine and so on, so forth. Whatever it is, life goes on...

I supposed if there's one thing we cannot prevent, I guess it would be office politics. You may strive to become neutral and NOT get involved but somehow or rather, you'll be pulled into it. One of my colleague (whom I have been treating really nice to) actually thought that I backstabbed her in front of my boss (just because I'm quite close to him). This made me really upset because all these while, I have been really nice to her and she has the guts to think like that. I knew about this because I confronted her (I notice that she has been giving me cold shoulder, avoiding eye contact and her body language practically screams "I want to avoid you")and she admitted that she finds me highly suspicious. I told her that whatever she does is not relevant to me (we are in different departments reporting to the same boss) and there's no reason why I should backstab her. But anyway, since I didn't do it, there's practically nothing that I should be afraid of so it's really up to her on what she thinks. One thing I learn from this, we shouldn't be nice to people. Sigh... what a cruel world!